Tuesday, January 20, 2026

The so long thong song

(Cultural note - a thong in Australia is known as flip-flops or jandals or I don't know what elsewhere.  What some elsewhere people call a thong is a g-string here - glad we have cleared that up.  Below is regarding footwear not floss) 

 Lost in the annals of time,

Twas a tale of of a twin unentwined

On a merry-go-round dropped?

At a Mount Perry pit stop

My thong and her pair 

Split - life being unkind.


To a group Perry bound I lament-ed

The divorce left me hopping quite mad

For this "three pairs for ten"

The least worst of a neat half dozen

Slivered art between feet and and the pad.


For years long the lone thong 

Formed an alter - strong in the hope that she - the other, the lost - would walk right back in to our lives. 

Hope disintegrates to despair.

Unable to bear the pain of the lost possibility any longer 

One Tuesday evening I allowed her to be taken away in a rare Marie Kondo moment - was I wrong?

Christmas last my eldest 'Salina cleaned the inside of my car.

Dusted the dash,
Flossed the furniture,
Defragged the detritus tween the 

Here I have to interrupt myself - I was getting a bit d- d- d- and I thought that I would try my ham French on AI and see what we could do. I was trying to convey the concept of car seats using attempted phrasing of "derriere" and the places where one may put theirs, and I thought "throne" and put an extra d- in there to continue with alliteration and to an Aussie chick like me, that would be funny.

The French AI did not think that I was funny, and suggested that I not use the Anglo throne, perhaps I meant "troner" and so I thought " well it does sound more French-y, try that" and the dumb French AI dude said that traditionally the French did not associate the derriere with the "troner" and, well, you see what's going on.


Based on the search results, "trone derrier" (or likely trône derrière in French) refers to a few different contexts, primarily a phrase describing something sitting in a place of honor, or a specific design brand:
Trôner derrière (to sit/reign behind): Used to describe something prominently placed, such as a, "La patronne du magasin trône derrière la caisse" (The owner sits/reigns behind the cash register), or a large sculpture sitting behind a bar.
Trone (Parisian Design Brand): A brand specializing in modern, colorful, and unique ceramic toilets and bathroom fixtures.
"Sprout a craqué son slip" (TV Series): A series where a boy's best friend is his own butt (derrière), which sometimes rebels. 
If you were referring to a specific image or phrase in a context not listed here, please provide more details.

Cracking on with the thong.


So I tidied the pile left behind 

'Mongst the boxes of things that you find

When you sift through your life 

Mother and daughter and wife

And up pops this one of a kind.


"I found her" I glee with delight
Then it dawns with true oversight 
That it's never to be
Lest the fates intervene 
And I binned her pronto without fight.

Now the moral, I am sorry to say 
For this lament of the one believed astray
Is missing complete 
Like beneath the back seat 
The thong was going Schrodinger's way.


9 comments:

Kelly said...

This is so entertaining! Yes, I called that kind of shoe a thong when growing up, but these days always think of the tiny article of clothing when I hear the term. 😂 Add to that derrieres, thrones, etc..... I can't help but laugh!

Debby said...

I have lived that. All you need to do is substitute 'thong' with 'earring'. Or 'sock'. 'Tupperware' even, although that has never wound up in the crack in the car.

River said...

I have had a lone thing for years, it is now a spider-smacker. Its partner was broken not lost.

River said...

"thong" not thing.

Jeanie said...

I loved your poem and definitely remember when we called flip-flops "thongs." (Then they came out with the thong underwear and swimsuits and all that stopped over here.) You've a wonderful turn of phrase but this is a line I adored: "One Tuesday evening I allowed her to be taken away in a rare Marie Kondo moment - was I wrong?"

jeanie said...

I really only do have very basic French - but derriere may have been one of my first!

jeanie said...

There is another dimension with the missing lids

jeanie said...

So many levels to unpack :) One question is why the good thong has been kept rather than the broken one repurposed, but you could go full therapy sessions over less!

jeanie said...

When spoken it rhymes well with longer if you really tweak the g there ..