Friday, July 25, 2008

Pensieve

That is IT! Five posts of blither and, although I am not yet hale and hearty, I am heartily sick of the bad blogging being generated by me.

So instead, I have taken inspiration from Robyn at Penseive and will concoct a poem. She has invented a new poetry form called "A Pensieve" - I like it as it doesn't call for patterns in rhyme or rhythm - which, if you know me as a poet, you know that I don't either!!

Here are the rules:
What is a Pensieve? A titled, five-line poem; each line correlates to one of the five senses--sight, sound, scent, taste, touch--and describes the subject (title). The goal is for the reader to take on the poem as his own, being able to "experience" your subject through your words, by seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and feeling what you described.


Now, the only problem with this is that often you do not try to taste so many things that you would like to describe, but here goes...

Hoons
Yah!!! Go rev your engine, let its gargling screams screech elsewhere.
Let your laser speed stripes reflect across some other crossroads
    Your spinouts muddy some other street and grit their mailboxes
    Vapours of your joy cause others to cough
    And the sad aftertaste of your fuel be more appreciated there.

Still pretty crappy - and so am I...

18 comments:

debby said...

Okay. Maybe you need to do a Aussie dictionary as well. Hoon means what?

jeanie said...

Hoons are imbeciles who burn rubber in an attempt to impress - who or what they are trying to impress I do not know, but they certainly do nothing for my esteem!

Bush Babe (of Granite Glen) said...

Deb is on a sharp learning curve with Strine, eh Deb?? Hoon = moron = idiots behind the wheel! There is a great ad on TV here at the moment, where a bloke takes off at a stoplight and two pretty girls smile at each other and wriggle their little finger... not sure if that's an international sign for small appendage?? Should be! You should post it here Jeanie!!
:-)
PS Poem is good, so are you!

Jayne said...

Some random furniture tacks on the road works wonders....or waggle your pinkie finger at them lol :P

Robin said...

Hey, I'm coughing and sputtering after reading...that means it was an EFFECTIVE pensieve. Which is the goal, yes?

Thank you for the explanation of "hoon", though. Otherwise, it wouldn't have made near as much sense.

:)

debby said...

I'd actually heard of this advertising blitz. It was being discussed on a morning radio show. I asked a friend in Sydney. He 'splained it.

jeanie said...

Here is the wiki entry for hoon - such a widespread term in Australia it is part of many legislation titles!

I will have to find a Youtube of that ad - I know there is one floating around.

Furniture tacks are a great idea - so long as they would not then spin out of control into your front yard (which they did to a neighbour without the benefit of tacks)

Mama Zen said...

Hey, I liked it!

Joy said...

Appreciated the poem! It was very funny because I can relate... we have kids that do "doughnuts" (basically drive in circles really fast and burn rubber) and it's SO ANNOYING!!! Great way to capture your feelings!

debby said...

Yes, Jeanie, there is. Jeremy sent me two You-tube videos.

M+B said...

Great pensieve, Jeanie and such interesting subject matter :-)

Hope that lurgy departs your system soon!

debby said...

And Jeanie, maybe you should just pack it in and see a doctor.

Pamela said...

Now this one just paints a wonderful yet frustrating event.
WOW.

Julie Pippert said...

I love your "in the daily life of JiP" posts.

Karmyn R said...

I don't know exactly what a Hoon is - but I think you captured it very well - including the taste!!!

WT said...

I hate rev heads.

Oh and Jeanie, I find this is a useful link for when people ask me questions

Eve said...

Good word - Hoons. I think I'll have to adopt it for use in America.

I could smell the unburnt fuel and taste the smoke. You got me! Great pensieve.

Brandon Satrom said...

No, no this is good. I love the subject... very well done.