WARNING: This post contains adult content, outrageous venting and references to sex. If you are related to me by blood or marriage; or not related to me but are likely to be offended and/or have a problem with me discussing, alluding to, viewing documentaries on or actually possibly thinking about engaging in the "s" activity, I recommend that you stop reading pretty soon. I mean, I will start innocently enough, but you never know when one of those references might just catch you off guard.
Anyhow, so we are fans of The Biggest Loser up (or down) here, for good reason.
For a start, it occupied a reasonable timeslot. I mean, I once did attempt the "watch news with my daughter" experiment, but the reality is that news is not child friendly these days. After 3 days of the opening being sexual assault and/or war it got binned - at least with TBL you don't lose too much innocence.
And then there is the message of obesity being shoved down our children's throats. (Was I wrong, or was there one moment in history where it was felt too much emphasis on body image might damage children? It appears that moment has passed.) Kids these days are being force-fed the anti-obese message. I agree that in many instances a wakeup call is needed - however I think that the junk food industry and the knowledge-wanting parents would be better targets.
Anyhow, some children reflect that message and equate it with their mothers (who I might remind you may be a little more generous than the average Jeanie, but then you have some skinny Jeanies out there to bring the bell curve back). So it pays for children to see people who are a bit bigger than their mothers getting trim, taut and terrific. Even if for no other reason than to give the mother the comeback "if I lost that much weight I would weigh less than you" - works all round really.
So anyway, as of last week, we got a reprieve from later bedtimes because this season is over, and the season of inane contriviality programming is upon us once again. I love it when Big Brother (Jaycee's take here) returns to our screens - because for us it means the tv is turned off and we can have a peaceful runup to dreamland.
However, extracting those last few pounds of flesh, Channel 10 aired the Grand Finale at the child unfriendly time of 7.30 - 9.30pm on Thursday (yes, a school night) - so we taped it, and watched it last night at a reasonable time.
Now, that all had nothing to do with sex - so far so good. I mean, if I am talking about child-friendly viewing I am not talking about sex - that bit comes later - that was the outrageous venting part of this post.
Anyhow, after our fill of TBL and a sweet dreams serenade to 'Salina, V and I settled to our Friday night rituals - which, in Queensland at this time of year, includes the football - and it appears, absolutely nothing else on television.
Now, background filler - V and I met due to the mighty power of the internet (hey, we thank other entities too, but the actual power was that of the internet). In the little portions of information you give to the world, there was one section labelled "Sport". V admitted to having a liking of many things sporting, especially where speed, biff and balls were concerned (my response was "I am a good one"). Hooray he didn't put any hands up to motor sports because that was a deal breaker for me!
What about my take on ball sports? Well hey, I grew up in Central Queensland - if you didn't know the basics of Rugby League from infancy you were a pariah in the school yard. So I don't mind the occasional viewing of biff so long as it doesn't incude santimonious silence and alcoholic guzzling. I am a closet sport watcher actually - just so long as it is not machines going Vrrrroom-Vrrrroom-Vrrrroom-Vrrrroom for hours on end. So I knew what I was letting myself in for.
While the "long-distance" portion of our relationship was in full swing, footy season was nigh finished. (It actually finished the night that he met my family - great bonding experience, meet the family and watch the Grand Final!) But his move down here has coincided with the season opening, and so Friday nights are no longer (just) candlelit dinners etc, etc (you fill in the details - I get a feeling that my family are still reading.)
So where were we - oh yes, child in bed and the Broncos were getting a hiding. So anyway, we did what we could to get them over the line and resultantly missed the end of the game.
As there was little to offer on Friday night television, I thought "beauty" when I realised that the tape with TBL had a Law & Order - Criminal Intent on it. Would you believe the tape finished before we had it wrapped up. Not sure what happened - we were on the cusp of the wierd detective finangling another twist on the twisted minds of who did what to whom and why. Now, I will never know - another 45 minutes of my life just wasted!!!
Back to real time tv (I read a blog this week about TiVo and wanting to pause or replay life - if you can find it for me that would be great - don't you hate that?) - the choices were: Rugby League (Bulldogs getting flogged by the Tigers - who cares?); Aussie Rules (Port playing someone and the highlight was the rain); Big Brother Up Late (and why would you stay up with them?); JTV (normally good, but had an Anzac feature on Hack about PTSD and suicide) or a documentary from Canada about teens and sex.
While watching it, we became uncomfortable - because in about 7 years, 'Salina will be one of those 14 year olds - and we may have to deal with the sex part. And while it is 7 years away, that still seems too little time to prepare us (oh, and her) for what that will all mean.
It made me feel really old and square, watching those 14 year old girls feeling pressured into doing things to fit in and conform. I went to boarding school during those years so cannot really know, and my "release" into the evil outside was a pitted with landmines - the only difference between those naive 14 year olds and the 18 year old me was that I could legally drink.
Nowadays I am much more secure in myself and my sexuality, and I am very thankful that I have reached that part of my life. Obviously I am still a prude about talking to the internet about it all, because I can STILL feel my mother listening in!
But I wonder how to be so confident in relating to my child/young woman what I have learned over that time.
I mean, which of my mistakes should I detour around? Which of my mistakes would be useful teaching tools? Which of my mistakes to slip to her so she can make those mistakes and learn those lessons through experience?
My mother just handed me a book entitled "Everything a Teenage Girl Should Know" (not this one) when I asked too many questions - which was pretty useless, as I had read it with my sister when she got her copy 2 years before.
who/what/when/where/how and why - and do we wait for her to instigate?
It was too much - the TV had to be switched off and we had to go to bed.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Friday, April 27, 2007
The View from Here
Okay, I may not have reached the zenith aspirationally speaking in terms of the pit to my right, but we have moved from Nadir - and (drumroll please):
Thats right, my phone message has been left on Beverley's desk by Donna (I know them so well) at the fixit station where my hopes of clean laundry can be realised, so I may be only a verse or two away from clean clothes happiness again!!
Add to that the fact that someone rode with her daughter to school today, was entrusted with the secret project for the kids to present to the mothers on Mother's Day (cause the same muggins is going to supervise children individually next week on the project) AND has cleared away the detrious of the 25% job I did on the black hole so that only a few neat stacks under furniture give away that any attempt was made on its monstrousness at all!!!
So what to the of loads of laundry, washing up and floor cleaning required. Bah humbug to the work crew devastating trees and tearing up dirt across the road putting pipes in (for the last few days and possibly the next few weeks). I have achieved and nothing can take away from the high of that!
I have found the piece of paper!!!!
Thats right, my phone message has been left on Beverley's desk by Donna (I know them so well) at the fixit station where my hopes of clean laundry can be realised, so I may be only a verse or two away from clean clothes happiness again!!
Add to that the fact that someone rode with her daughter to school today, was entrusted with the secret project for the kids to present to the mothers on Mother's Day (cause the same muggins is going to supervise children individually next week on the project) AND has cleared away the detrious of the 25% job I did on the black hole so that only a few neat stacks under furniture give away that any attempt was made on its monstrousness at all!!!
So what to the of loads of laundry, washing up and floor cleaning required. Bah humbug to the work crew devastating trees and tearing up dirt across the road putting pipes in (for the last few days and possibly the next few weeks). I have achieved and nothing can take away from the high of that!
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Thursdays Child
Actually, I wasn't one - I was a Wednesday's Child - how depressing is it to look at your future as being coined "full of woe"? Thursdays children have a better outlook, in that they can get away from it all, methinks.
That being said, we have been a long way this Thursday thus far, but I still can't see the end of the Thursday tunnel...
Besides the linen that I have to wash due to a head lice alert1 at school, I have actually (drum roll please) removed, folded and put away all the linen, clothing and plastic bags from one of the spare beds in the spare room.
In spite of bucket hole number 7 emerging2 I have almost managed to get all that linen washed and intend to hang it when the sun is past frying stages.
To offset facing my house's other black hole (to my right - laughably known as "the filing pile") I now have the most wonderfully organised pantry - I even used all spare Moccona jars to achieve the effect of uniformity and prosperity!!!
But that black hole is taunting me... It has a sinister sneer about my need to approach, and I have to have to have to - I have $40 riding on it, and finding that bit of paper will mean that I can get the Electrolux EcoValve 6.5kg Front-Loading Washing Machine back into the loop which means I will no longer get angst, so although I have far to go, I WILL OVERCOME THE CHALLENGE it presents.
Just after I have made the beds, had a cuppa, checked all hair, got urgent groceries, made dinner.. I am sure there is nothing on TV tonight...is there?
(Hmm, I think this post has proven, yet again, that I truly am a Wednesday's child!)
By the way - in order to avoid the black hole, I have learned things today (and last night - Anzac Day holiday yesterday meant long activity filled day culminating in meltdown, so last night's blog read was quite late!)
1 I know there are wonderful paragons out there whose child has never had one of the - believe me, if there is a hla within cooee of us my child's head will be targetted by the critters. This is despite ridding scalps and wearing deterrent for the past 6 months!
2 I now get a waterlogged laundry floor each time I wash and have to jimmy the clicky thing that says the lid is closed for the old machine to work.
That being said, we have been a long way this Thursday thus far, but I still can't see the end of the Thursday tunnel...
Besides the linen that I have to wash due to a head lice alert1 at school, I have actually (drum roll please) removed, folded and put away all the linen, clothing and plastic bags from one of the spare beds in the spare room.
In spite of bucket hole number 7 emerging2 I have almost managed to get all that linen washed and intend to hang it when the sun is past frying stages.
To offset facing my house's other black hole (to my right - laughably known as "the filing pile") I now have the most wonderfully organised pantry - I even used all spare Moccona jars to achieve the effect of uniformity and prosperity!!!
But that black hole is taunting me... It has a sinister sneer about my need to approach, and I have to have to have to - I have $40 riding on it, and finding that bit of paper will mean that I can get the Electrolux EcoValve 6.5kg Front-Loading Washing Machine back into the loop which means I will no longer get angst, so although I have far to go, I WILL OVERCOME THE CHALLENGE it presents.
Just after I have made the beds, had a cuppa, checked all hair, got urgent groceries, made dinner.. I am sure there is nothing on TV tonight...is there?
(Hmm, I think this post has proven, yet again, that I truly am a Wednesday's child!)
By the way - in order to avoid the black hole, I have learned things today (and last night - Anzac Day holiday yesterday meant long activity filled day culminating in meltdown, so last night's blog read was quite late!)
- 8 Centimeters Deluded: Not Just By Court Order - After the meltdown both 'Salina and I had yesterday, I ran fresh out of ideas of how to be a better mother - and this post struck a chord!
- Nina at Destinations: thanks, I think - Nina has a mystery mower man, and is pondering the compliment it means
- scribbit: Raising a Reader | A Blog About Motherhood in Alaska - Scribbett has a great idea - again!
1 I know there are wonderful paragons out there whose child has never had one of the - believe me, if there is a hla within cooee of us my child's head will be targetted by the critters. This is despite ridding scalps and wearing deterrent for the past 6 months!
2 I now get a waterlogged laundry floor each time I wash and have to jimmy the clicky thing that says the lid is closed for the old machine to work.
Monday, April 23, 2007
Monday Monday
Having successfully avoided housework in any shape for some time now, I finally have a week fairly free where I can steamroll it - my best housework strategy.
On Friday, the only excuse I shall have is an exam as I have been reprieved of weekly tuckshop to every two weeks - hooray!
On Thursday, the only excuse I shall have is cycling 'Salina to and from school - we practiced yesterday and it is doable - just not always preferable, considering the free bus service picks up and delivers from one house away.
On Wednesday it shall not be done much, as it is a public holiday here and we are having a friend of 'Salina's for a few hours (on the proviso that both friend and she are on best behaviours for their mothers in the interim).
Tomorrow, the only excuse I shall have is Centrelink and Girl Guides.
We did our utmost to advise Centrelink in advance on my change in status - not because we have seen the ads but because we are honest people. Unfortunately their system cannot handle such honesty or efficiency. So on their advice we told them immediately V was officially in residence, tried to pry any more t's to cross and i's to dot that was possible and gave them as much paperwork as they requested at that moment in time. However, it seems their system cannot handle this courtesy either, and so have "breached" me.
I don't mind they aren't supporting my lifestyle - I have done my best for years to keep them happy, what with earning pin money and advising them so they would not find the burden of me too onerous. I am happy for them not to be intimate with all aspects of my life (even though they still want all of that and a pint of V's blood too). I do have a problem with them using such language toward me and blemishing my Centrelink career.
(I must admit, it is not spotless - I was breached once before, the week of 'Salina's father's death, as I had informed them and Child Support of this situation. My "breach" was that I was no longer enforcing the Child Support. Another statistic for Howard).
Oh, and the Girl Guides leader has learned I know how to drive a sewing machine, and miss Hand-Automatically-Up has a few sashes to put together for the Anzac Day parade.
Today the excuse I have is that it is my birthday, and my lovely V and gorgeous 'Salina implored me to leave the filth for another day to indulge in as much sloth as I could.
On Friday, the only excuse I shall have is an exam as I have been reprieved of weekly tuckshop to every two weeks - hooray!
On Thursday, the only excuse I shall have is cycling 'Salina to and from school - we practiced yesterday and it is doable - just not always preferable, considering the free bus service picks up and delivers from one house away.
On Wednesday it shall not be done much, as it is a public holiday here and we are having a friend of 'Salina's for a few hours (on the proviso that both friend and she are on best behaviours for their mothers in the interim).
Tomorrow, the only excuse I shall have is Centrelink and Girl Guides.
We did our utmost to advise Centrelink in advance on my change in status - not because we have seen the ads but because we are honest people. Unfortunately their system cannot handle such honesty or efficiency. So on their advice we told them immediately V was officially in residence, tried to pry any more t's to cross and i's to dot that was possible and gave them as much paperwork as they requested at that moment in time. However, it seems their system cannot handle this courtesy either, and so have "breached" me.
I don't mind they aren't supporting my lifestyle - I have done my best for years to keep them happy, what with earning pin money and advising them so they would not find the burden of me too onerous. I am happy for them not to be intimate with all aspects of my life (even though they still want all of that and a pint of V's blood too). I do have a problem with them using such language toward me and blemishing my Centrelink career.
(I must admit, it is not spotless - I was breached once before, the week of 'Salina's father's death, as I had informed them and Child Support of this situation. My "breach" was that I was no longer enforcing the Child Support. Another statistic for Howard).
Oh, and the Girl Guides leader has learned I know how to drive a sewing machine, and miss Hand-Automatically-Up has a few sashes to put together for the Anzac Day parade.
Today the excuse I have is that it is my birthday, and my lovely V and gorgeous 'Salina implored me to leave the filth for another day to indulge in as much sloth as I could.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Blog Dreams
I have been having some amazingly vivid dreams at the moment.
There was the one where I went to visit my gay friend in Sydney and he introduced me to his new partner, who happened to be a woman with a child. When I was surprised he told me that it wasn't just about sex - he was still gay - but that he had found his soul mate in this woman. Later on in the dream another friend of mine was trying to hide the fact that she was smoking spaghetti strands!
One of my dreams of last week I went to a party that was in the middle of nowhere in a small group of weatherboard houses, and some sort of meeting was taking place in a large CWA type hall. After that we went outside and Cecily from "And I Wasted All that Birth Control" and Charlie, her real life husband from "It Ain't All Pizzas and Cream asked me to look after their little girl while they and a few others from my real life went into a meeting in another hall. Do I spend too much time here?
Last night, I was walking through a park with 'Salina (do you ever have the same places that are not real in your dreams - well, it was a park I often visit in my dreams) and I looked around and all these trees had just begun bring forth buds of cherry blossom in the most vivid colours, and we could stand there and watch them bloom. As I looked up into the lemon yellow sky (it was pretty psychadelic - you should have seen the shades of the grass) I thought to myself "I must blog about this".
Over the last few days I am trying to catch up on all the blogs that I missed by being rather busy during the holidays. Some have inspired. cRaZy tRacE: Collector.. or hoarder? It's a fine line made me laugh as I have the Moccona collection. Today I actually converted some into storage in the pantry - so reading blogs is in no way a waste of time if it sparks reactions of that calibre. And Muppinstuff's "Hang it Out" caused me to contemplate my development of OCD with the washing line - oh, and I am sure the additional rub off is that all clothes previously adorning one spare bed have now been put away or hung, and all the laundry (that the old girl had to swish around yesterday - grr) hung, dried and folded (okay, okay, not yet put away but its neat)...
Brilliant day here in Paradise. We did not cycle, as 'Salina now loves it so much it can be used as a punishment and she was pretty feral last night but wore it pretty well!
Saw my sister-in-law and the cousins today quickly for her to give us our late Easter present - a very large can! We have been missing our fix, as their family did visit us during a rather hectic period after they had holidayed and accidentally taken ours - and our emergency supply ran out last week! My brother did not attend today, as he was woodchopping at the Mt Perry Show.
We still don't have an oven, but I made a mean pot roast today in the crockpot. All the veges were subsequently mashed and V did his thing with the steamed greens and corn and my gravy was de-vine. 'Salina promised that she would eat all the veges - and did - wants them presented like that again soon - music to this mother's ears, as she is more the "5 fruit and 1/2 veg" a day variety of eater. Once I had V where I wanted him, I whispered sweet enticements into his ear about how my roasts are so much better out of an oven. He is now dreaming about that - I am now going to awaken him from that, as it IS Saturday night here, and they were such precious commodoties only weeks ago, we can't yet get complacent!
There was the one where I went to visit my gay friend in Sydney and he introduced me to his new partner, who happened to be a woman with a child. When I was surprised he told me that it wasn't just about sex - he was still gay - but that he had found his soul mate in this woman. Later on in the dream another friend of mine was trying to hide the fact that she was smoking spaghetti strands!
One of my dreams of last week I went to a party that was in the middle of nowhere in a small group of weatherboard houses, and some sort of meeting was taking place in a large CWA type hall. After that we went outside and Cecily from "And I Wasted All that Birth Control" and Charlie, her real life husband from "It Ain't All Pizzas and Cream asked me to look after their little girl while they and a few others from my real life went into a meeting in another hall. Do I spend too much time here?
Last night, I was walking through a park with 'Salina (do you ever have the same places that are not real in your dreams - well, it was a park I often visit in my dreams) and I looked around and all these trees had just begun bring forth buds of cherry blossom in the most vivid colours, and we could stand there and watch them bloom. As I looked up into the lemon yellow sky (it was pretty psychadelic - you should have seen the shades of the grass) I thought to myself "I must blog about this".
Over the last few days I am trying to catch up on all the blogs that I missed by being rather busy during the holidays. Some have inspired. cRaZy tRacE: Collector.. or hoarder? It's a fine line made me laugh as I have the Moccona collection. Today I actually converted some into storage in the pantry - so reading blogs is in no way a waste of time if it sparks reactions of that calibre. And Muppinstuff's "Hang it Out" caused me to contemplate my development of OCD with the washing line - oh, and I am sure the additional rub off is that all clothes previously adorning one spare bed have now been put away or hung, and all the laundry (that the old girl had to swish around yesterday - grr) hung, dried and folded (okay, okay, not yet put away but its neat)...
Brilliant day here in Paradise. We did not cycle, as 'Salina now loves it so much it can be used as a punishment and she was pretty feral last night but wore it pretty well!
Saw my sister-in-law and the cousins today quickly for her to give us our late Easter present - a very large can! We have been missing our fix, as their family did visit us during a rather hectic period after they had holidayed and accidentally taken ours - and our emergency supply ran out last week! My brother did not attend today, as he was woodchopping at the Mt Perry Show.We still don't have an oven, but I made a mean pot roast today in the crockpot. All the veges were subsequently mashed and V did his thing with the steamed greens and corn and my gravy was de-vine. 'Salina promised that she would eat all the veges - and did - wants them presented like that again soon - music to this mother's ears, as she is more the "5 fruit and 1/2 veg" a day variety of eater. Once I had V where I wanted him, I whispered sweet enticements into his ear about how my roasts are so much better out of an oven. He is now dreaming about that - I am now going to awaken him from that, as it IS Saturday night here, and they were such precious commodoties only weeks ago, we can't yet get complacent!
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