I was going to be laid back. The sort of mother who would be so cool to hang around. If something came up, I was going to have my child so well adapted that she would surf any change and enjoy the adventure. My child was going to be confident and able to bounce any experience because she would have such a totally awesome mother.
My life was not going to be boring, and my daughter was not going to have a boring mother.
ha ha ha ha.
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
A HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
Yes, universe, lets all join in and LAUGH at that concept.
Unfortunately, I discovered after not too much experimentation that this vision of myself as a mother was just not going to work.
For a start - I have never been a "cool" person. More a quirky square with idiosyncrasies. The people I hang around with tend to be of the same cloth as me, so that went by the by.
I found that my "laid back" strategy had a few holes - there are moments when tautness is called for in parenting, and it is much easier to assume taut from a more upright position.
My child was a normal child. She had confidence in spades - sometimes for minutes at a time. But she also discovered the delights of playing with fears, and not every experience ends in "bounce" - sometimes they end in "shatter" and you have to be prepared to put them all back together again.
I found I was not a "normal" mother.
But I also learned that there are very few card holding members of the normal mothers club.
I discovered that going shopping can be an adventure if you play it right (or wrong).
And I found being boring can be very rewarding - especially if boring means a child not undergoing meltdown.
As a result, we have a v-e-r-y set routine during the week, and excitement on the weekends can tend towards the planned end of the spectrum.
When we dovetailed V into our lives, he learned to adapt fairly well. Considering his previous life meant he was only responsible and answerable to himself he has been admirable in his lack of meltdowns.
Due to commitments last year, Tuesday night was always his turn to cook dinner - and it has been such a loved institution that we have continued. As he is originally a Southern Californian boy (although he has had half a life of Aussification), we let him cook us tacos and burritos - well, we let him chop the salad, grate the cheese, cook the mince and beans and heat the t&b, really.
He is very good at that.
So tonight is Taco night, something we all look forward to. And I want to share with you a recipe for Corn Tortillas* that I have carried around for years.
This is for those moments when you have forgotten to buy burritos, are too poor to shell out the $3-$4 for 15 Home Branders at Woolies, don't live anywhere near any place where they have Masa Harina (an ingredient needed in all corn tortilla recipes on the net) or just want to taste something yummy and different.
325 ml (11 oz) water
40 g (1.4 oz) butter
100 g (3.5 oz) polenta/cornmeal
175 g (6.2 oz) wholewheat flour
1 tsp salt
- Bring water to boil and add 1/2 butter.
- Stir in cornmeal over low heat.
- Cover and cook for 5 minutes.
- Stir in remaining butter until smooth.
- Leave to cool.
- Mix flour and salt together and stir in cooled cornmeal.
- Knead to soft dough.
- Divide into 12 and shape into a ball
- Roll each into 6-7" circle.
- Cook in ungreased frying pan for 2-3 minutes each side over moderate heat until flecked with dark spots.
I just got a phone call. From next week I will be the school tuckshop lady until they find a replacement. Eek! I certainly never expected to be this mother!